The Heavy Burden of Body Shame: Learning to Love Ourselves

Body shame is a heavy burden that many individuals carry around with them daily. It is the subtle voice that tells us we are not good enough, that certain parts of our bodies are not acceptable, or that we should not wear certain clothes. For individuals who have experienced trauma, body shame may be an even heavier burden as it often manifests as a result of the trauma they experienced. In this blog post, we will discuss the various ways in which we give in to body shame and how we can learn to love ourselves regardless of what we look like.

Firstly, body shame often takes form in the clothes we wear. We may feel we should not wear a tank top or a certain type of dress because our arms or legs may not be as toned as we would like them to be. We may also shy away from certain materials or colors because they do not hide our perceived flaws as much. This kind of thinking feeds into the notion that our worth is based on how appealing we are to others rather than how we feel about ourselves. The standard bodies we see in the media adds more fuel to this fire making us feel more inadequate. Eradication of this harmful behavior is important to healing.

Secondly, another way body shame rears its ugly head is through centering on certain parts of our bodies. We may feel that our thighs are too big or that our breasts are too small compared to societal beauty standards. We may even convince ourselves that these parts are so different than the “average” that we should be ashamed. Not only does this kind of thinking lead to a negative view of ourselves but it also reinforces the toxic idea that there is only one type of acceptable body type, whereas, in reality, there is an array of shapes, sizes, and color. Such negative views make us more vulnerable to mental health issues.

Thirdly, we may even hide certain parts of our bodies from our partners in intimate situations due to body shame. We may be self-conscious about a scar or a stretch mark or a part of our body that looks slightly "astray." This kind of thinking not only affects the way we relate to our partners but also perpetuates the cycle of shame, making us less able to fully accept ourselves. Developing a positive body image takes a conscious effort to love and accept ourselves even with our perceived flaws.

Fourthly, body shame can manifest even during delicate moments of our lives like pregnancy. We may shy away from taking pictures or even miss out on important events because we do not want to be in pictures with our seemingly imperfect bodies. This kind of thinking stifles our ability to celebrate important moments in our lives.

Conclusion:

Body shame is a heavy burden that can be devastating for individuals who are already struggling with trying to cope with the trauma they experienced. Learning to love and accept ourselves is essential to our healing and growth. We must acknowledge that we come in all shapes, sizes, and colors and that each of us is unique in our way. We must develop a positive body image by learning to embrace our perceived flaws and recognizing them as part of what makes us beautiful. We can break the cycle of shame by giving ourselves the gift of self-acceptance, and by doing so, we can learn to love ourselves, flaws and all.